I Depend on You

This week's question from #rethinkchurch: What are those temptations that rule me?

I've always been very confident in my ability to resist temptation, at least the obvious ones like sex, drugs, etc.  The temptation that rules me was explained in the following sentence.  Over-confidence.  It doesn't sound like much of a temptation, but it is a stumbling block for me.  My independence, or over-confidence in me, keeps me from seeking the help of others more able or more qualified.

My mom estimates that I was five or six years old when I stopped letting her or anyone else help me.  I've never struggled to help others, but I do not like being on the "needy" side.  The best lesson I've learned as a missionary is how to be in partnership with those I think I'm serving.

I shared with two UMW circles this week about the strengths of the children I work with.  I shared that they have some unique abilities and features that often go unrecognized.  They may want to fight sometimes, but they always stand up for their friends and others they care about.  They form strong attachments and like me, always want to help.  I've been trying to remind myself of their strengths and allow them to help me, because they do have a lot to offer.

They've been forced to ask for a lot of help in their life times, and I hope this is something they can teach me.  It's okay to ask for help.  It's okay to be dependent.  Today, Lord, I depend on you.

Praise God, from whom all blessings flow!

It's that season again...Lent.  I think some of us dread this time where we are asked to refocus our attention and either give up or start a new Christian practice.  I've done the traditional giving up chocolate, or fried food, or even Facebook and they did help me to refocus, but this year I signed up for the text alerts from Rethink Church.  Each Sunday, they send out a question to focus on and ponder for the week.

On Ash Wednesday, I received the first, asking "What are the basic needs in my community?"  Interesting... I thought about the basic needs and how many go unmet.  I am so blessed to wake up every day and not have to worry about my basic needs being met.  I laugh often with my fiancé about the difference between wants and needs.  I think that's the point of Lenten disciplines; it's time to sort out the difference between your needs and wants.  I've been interviewing at graduate schools the past few weeks, and their first question is always Why are you pursuing graduate studies?  After being asked this question over and over, I decided that my Lenten discipline was going to be asking Why?.  

Why do I want x? Why do I do y?  Why am I so focused on x and y?

While I try to refocus and sort out my wants and needs, I need to ask these questions.  I need to get back to the source, and I need to remember whose I am.

Sunday morning, we sang the doxology that most of you probably know by heart:

Praise God, from whom all blessings flow;
Praise Him, all creatures here below;
Praise Him above, ye heavenly host;
Praise Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.

I don't think I've ever listened closely enough to that.  All blessings flow from God; it's an idea so simple that I sometimes miss it.

Why do I praise God? Because the blessings given to me by God are more than I could ever earn.

Happy Shrove Tuesday!

It wasn't until college that someone finally explained to me what Shrove Tuesday was.  As you may be aware, tomorrow is Ash Wednesday and marks the beginning of Lent in the Christian calendar.  Lent is a period of fasting, and its start is celebrated by a day of cleaning out the cabinets and using the sugar, flour, etc.  Mardi Gras, or Fat Tuesday is the festival of celebration before Lent and so is Shrove Tuesday.  Traditionally, the celebration of Shrove Tuesday involves delicious pancakes.
Read more about Shrove Tuesday here.

I was shocked this morning to learn that IHOP was celebrating Shrove Tuesday by giving out free stacks of pancakes on this special day.  I curiously scanned the internet to find IHOP's religious affiliation (of which I had no prior knowledge, only to learn that "IHOP will be giving out free pancake short stacks in celebration of National Pancake Day, a holiday the company created in 2006."  Fancy that, IHOP created a holiday that mimics the celebration of a Christian holiday.  This is not something to protest or even be frustrated about. This is something to celebrate.

Please take advantage of this wonderful opportunity and celebrate Shrove Tuesday.  Don't worry, IHOP is footing the bill :)

Don't Worry, Be Thankful!

Well it's been two months since my last post.  I'll blame it on the holidays, like everyone else does.

I had the joy of going home for Thanksgiving and spending the weekend with my extended family (including my sister's boyfriend, my fiance, and all our pets).  Life was crazy between Thanksgiving and Christmas as we prepared for Christmas at Murphy-Harpst.  The kids performed a spectacular Christmas play; we did an advent bible study; and, the elves survived the influx of gifts, sorting, and delivery.  I then got to enjoy another week home with my sister and parents before kicking off the new year.

January has been cold in Georgia (too cold for my taste, at least), so a lot of activities have been occurring inside.  Track practice at Murphy-Harpst has been inside nearly all month, but we're running our first 5K of the year this coming weekend.  Bible study has been going well, and I'm sharing some of what my Sunday School class discusses with the kids.  Since I volunteered to help teach Sunday School this quarter, it's really nice to look at each lesson and how it effects me, but also be able to hear the kids' takes on things.

The first chapter I shared with the kids was procrastination.  It's a new year and everything we put off until the new year is still waiting on us.  With a couple extra days out of school due to the weather, we joked that maybe the teachers were procrastinating from coming back.  The next week, we talked about stress and how most of us don't deal well with stress.

One of the young men asked me during our discussion, "Ms. Jerrica, why don't you talk to us about things that you deal with too?"  I chuckled and told him that everything I talk to them about, I deal with on a personal level.  Our conversation continued, and we contemplated Paul's words telling us not to worry.  It's hard to read those words, because I think everyone worries.  But, Paul's directions don't just tell us not to worry; they give us an alternative.

Philippians 4:6-7
"Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank Him for all He has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus."

The author of Slaying our Giants says that there are two ways to deal with stress and anxiety: concern and worry.  Concern is when you do what you can do and allow God to do the rest.  Worry is when you mull over the same thing over and over for no reason.  Our tendency is to worry about things.  I do it. You do it. We all do it.  Most of the time, our worries are out of our hands.  If you're worried about a friend or family member, you can talk to them and try to help.  But, once you've done your part, you have to give the rest to God and trust that God's will be done.  Only then can we experience God's peace, which exceeds anything we can understand.

On Friday, I was in a car accident, and afterwards I thought to myself that there were several ways I could respond.

1. I could be angry at the person who caused the accident, who was not paying attention.
2. I could be worried about how I'm going to get places with no car, not enough money to buy a new one, etc.
3. I could trust God.  Tell God my needs and thank Him for all He has done.  

With only minimal soreness, I am healthier than most people on a normal day.  That's not something to be angry or worried about.  That's something to be thankful for :)  Have a great day, and remember to tell God what you need and thank Him for all He has done.

God's Sense of Humor

This week has been awesome and super busy.  It's secretly how I like it; I may complain about being so busy and barely having time to breathe, but I agree to do so many things, because I love busy weeks that are full of excitement.  It would take an hour to write all the details, but let me highlight the great adventures of my week.

On Tuesday, I went to Tucker, Georgia - a place formerly unknown to me to speak at the Lawrenceville Road United Methodist Women's Fall Tea.  Of course, I was expecting a small tea with 15-20 ladies and was surprised by the sixty or so women from the Atlanta-Emory District.  We had a great time, and they blessed me and Murphy-Harpst with new books and DVDs for our library, leftover sandwiches and desserts for the kids, and a beautiful love offering.  These women are so passionate about the ministry and speaking to several of the ladies before and after tea was so refreshing for my spirit.

Women at the Lawrenceville Road UMW Fall Tea with their donation

On Wednesday, I traveled to Atlanta for a large career fair with twenty-seven universities and dozens of employers.  I shared with students about the opportunities of the United Methodist Church for service and about possible employment and internship opportunities at Murphy-Harpst.  Once again, I felt inspired to hear so many young people looking for a way to make a difference in the lives of children.

Matt and I at our friends' wedding last week

Now it's Friday, and my week is nowhere near over.  Today is Matt's 30th birthday, so we will be celebrating with his parents tonight, and I'm planning some special birthday festivities.

Tomorrow, I will be sharing with the Rome-Carollton UMW ladies at their district meeting, and on Sunday, I will be in Bremen for a mission event.

Like I said, busy.

Here's where God's sense of humor comes in.  On Monday, I told Matt about everything happening this week.  I even put it on the weekly calendar I got for him to keep up with me. :)  Every Thursday, we have a chapel service at Murphy-Harpst, and I told him that if our chaplain Brother Wayne called and asked me to fill in, I was going to have to turn him down.  Well... last night around 6pm when we were supposed to start, I found out that Brother Wayne's father had been hospitalized due to heart failure and he would not make it.  Was I going to cancel chapel at the last minute with nothing planned?  Of course not.  I chuckled as I walked to my office to get my computer for the service and assured Brother Wayne that we would figure it out.  We lift Brother Wayne and his family up in our prayers because health issues are serious.  However, God laughed in my face last night, saying you said you wouldn't do what? 

We had a beautiful service, full of song, dance, and the Word.  God had plans for the kids to hear a message, and I'm glad I didn't get in the way of that.  To God be the glory, forever and ever, amen.

Planning the Future

I love when God intervenes in my plans for bible study, and this week was one of those weeks.  We were discussing this week what happens when God's plan differs from our own.  I always try to come up with some kind of activity that works with the lesson, so I decided to pair up the kids and have them work together to create something without communicating.  I picked paper airplanes, which turned out fantastic.  Each pair was asked to make a paper airplane by making one fold and then passing it to their partner for the next fold.  They couldn't share what their plan was, and some pairs worked better than others.

My first partner got very frustrated when I made a fold that wasn't in his plan, and actually raised his voice to tell me that I wasn't doing it right.  I laughed out loud as he made the point that I was planning to make later in the discussion.  When God makes a fold that isn't in our plan, we usually get frustrated.  I told the kids beforehand that they were not allowed to unfold what their partner did, and it forced them to adapt to the unplanned fold of their airplane.

Our lives are like the paper airplanes we built.  We build our lives with God, but when our plan differs from God's, we can get frustrated or we can try to work together by following God's lead.  Something we forget is that God is the master airplane builder.  God knows how to build the perfect airplane, but our cooperation is required.

Romans 12:2 states "Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s [plan] is—his good, pleasing and perfect [plan]. (NIV)

God does have a good, pleasing, and perfect plan that is sometimes not what we have planned.  I read a story in a devotional recently about a woman named Linda.  Her story was about her plan to become a medical missionary - a good plan that would probably be pleasing to God.  Instead, when she was fourteen, she acquired bacterial meningitis which put her in the hospital for a large portion of her childhood including an entire year at one point.  This was obviously not her plan, but instead of staying frustrated, she trusted God and God's light radiated from her during her hospitalization.  She tells the story with wisdom, saying that her mission field as she intended was the hospital, but she served God as a patient, not a doctor.

This was hard for the kids to wrap their minds around, as many of them have indicated that they'd like to help kids someday who have been in their situation.  I reminded them that they can do that right here.  They can serve God as a young person in the way that they want to serve God in the future.  Laura Story sings a song that has been so inspirational for me recently.  If you sometimes feel that God has abandoned you, I hope that this can give you a new perspective.  The chorus is below along with the YouTube video.  I hope that its message is as powerful for you as it is for me. :)

What if your blessings come through rain drops

What if Your healing comes through tears

What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near

What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

Books, Literally!

This past month has been great!  The kids are back in the school routine, and we are busy every evening with a number of activities.  My fall project is to rejuvenate our library and get the kids in there to check out and read more books.  I haven't been working on this project alone, and as a team, we have made significant progress!  After cleaning our collection and doing some organizing, a group of Methodist Nomads came to do some projects on campus, including painting our library.  The hunter green walls got a brighter upgrade to a light yellow, and we received new couches, chairs, and a conference table.  There are a few pictures below of the shelves I have organized and the ones I haven't finished yet.

Complete Fiction Section

Incomplete Nonfiction Section

While the physical appearance and organization is necessary, we also needed a technological update and some increased usage.  In the past month, the kids have had an opportunity each week to come visit the library and check out books.  This is definitely one asset that we had not been taking advantage of, and I'm so glad it was such an easy problem to solve.  The computer system has been upgraded with the current residents' names and next week begins our inventory! :O  We had an entire cart of books that have been recently donated but had not been tagged.  This took more work than I realized, but here is the final result.

Newly tagged books!

Of course, I couldn't spend my spare time with books and not let all those literary analogies influence the rest of my life.  So, this week our bible study had a bookworm twist.  We talked about the dark times in our lives, and on a roll of toilet paper, marked the years in which some negative events had occurred.  Then, we rolled out the paper to represent the average years we have to live.  We compared the first 8-16 years that we've experienced to the first chapter of a book.  Sometimes, the first chapter doesn't get us excited.  Maybe there's a lot of information that we're learning but we're a little bored.  I asked the kids what happens if they keep reading, and most said the books get better.  Some, however, said they tended to stop reading if they didn't like the beginning.  We decided that we all have that choice.  We've seen the first chapter, but we have no idea what the rest of life holds.  We have to keep living life to find out how our story continues.  

I took this quote from a book that I've been reading: "Your life will not be defined by this dark night of the soul.  Never does a single chapter of any book tell the whole story.”

We then stepped back and looked at the marks, the pain, in our pasts.  And, we talked about what God does with our own failures, and mistakes we have made.  We tore that part off and looked at a white slate.  We recognized that we are still going to have marks, times of pain, and times of disobedience towards God, but if we believe and have faith like Abraham, God will see us through the fire.

One year into my service, I still have so much to learn, and I'm grateful for the experiences God gives me every day.  Life is a beautiful adventure; go get it!